The Quick Brown Fox

The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.
    'Hold it right there, Mister!' says Inspector Bassett, rising from the pavement where he had been lying in wait and throwing off his 'lazy dog' disguise to reveal the uniform of the Metropolitan Constabulary.
    'I am entirely innocent,' says the fox.
    'Innocent of what?' says Inspector Bassett, quick fire.
    'Everything,' says the fox, trembling like a true liar.
    'In that case,' says the inspector, pocketing his warrant card, 'you won't mind showing me what's inside that bag.'
    'What bag?' asks the fox, unsuccessfully trying to hide said bag behind his back.
    'That bag right there,' says Inspector Bassett, pointing out the unavoidably obvious.
    'Oh, that bag,' says the fox virtuously. 'That's just my lunch sack. My granny packed it for me.'
    'So show me,' says the Inspector, stern and undeterred.
    Reluctantly, the fox opens the bag just the littlest bit.
    'You'll have to do better than that,' says the Inspector, leaning in to have a look.
    'I have terrible arthritis in my paws,' says the fox. 'I can barely open it as much as this. You'll have to lean in closer.'
    The Inspector obligingly does just that, and thwack! Something clobbers  him on the noggin. He reels back, already beginning to lose consciousness. 'You're Granny,' he says thickly as he swoons back down to the pavement, 'packs aone heck of a lunch!'
    Wasting no time, the quick brown fox jumps over the recumbent, and now mazy dog, and makes good his escape.